Prank wars part 1

12 Nov

Since the combination of graduate school AND horribly uninspiring dates have failed to be a source of stimulation in my life, I have been forced to explore other options- in the form of pranking.

Now, I know what you are thinking… Pranks are sooooo elementary school. I assure you, they are not. It takes a real and true evil genius to execute the perfect prank. I present to you, with humble admiration the first prank by my worst nightmare. It was the prank that was done to me and subsequently inspired me to become the prankmaster I am today.

Preface: I had an awesome shot pen, my worst nightmare decided to steal it from me while I was in the bathroom. I returned to class and DEMANDED my awesome shot pen however, my worst nightmare played the ignorant card so I left class penless and depressed…until 15 minutes later when I bought another one.

An hour or so later I recieved THIS email which terrified me to no end:

From: your worst nightmare <mrworstnightmare@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, 27 Oct 2010 17:51:04 -0400
Subject:  i believe i have what you are looking for…
By now you have probably noticed that your shot pen is missing from your personal belongings. If you have not noticed this fact yet then SURPRISE! i have to admit that i initially took the pen thinking it was in fact a heroin injection, as i was looking to try out the drug myself. Imagine my surprise when i found out the “needle” was not filled with heroin, rather red ink. Well initially i was going to put the pen back; however, upon hearing about how A) upset you were about the lost pen, and B) how excited you were to spend the last $3,000 in your bank account on a trip to China, one word popped into my mind. Ransom. You see, the first thing any good criminal knows is that if you are going to steal something and hold it as ransom it better be something the person values. Would you like to know what i value? Dior sungalsses, Chanel purses, Christian Louboutin shoes…all things i can purchase with $3000. yes, i am holding your pen ransom for $3000. you’re a genius. I understand that you might think this email is in jest, but i assure you it is not. The time has come for you to make a decision youngster, will it be China or your beloved pen. attached please find the photo i have taken of your pen. You have until 3pm tomorrow afternoon to deposit the money in the Jack-O-Lantern on the 7th floor at school before that scissor snaps your pen in half.
Sincerely,
Your Worst Nightmarep.s. any funny business and your pen is history

Here is my reply which CLEARLY caused my worst nightmare to resign his position as…well my worst night mare I guess.

BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OH PLEASE DON’T CUT MY INNOCENT SHOT PEN!!!!! PLEASE Mr. worst nightmare!!! I cant believe you are going to hold an innocent pen ransom! Of course I shall comply with your wishes and pay an exorbitant ransom that exactly 3000x the price i paid for it. except for the small problem that being i already bought another one on the way home from school today for a mere dollar. Oh well guess i foiled your evil plan.. WOOO now i can go to China AND have my awesome shot pen. So it looks like Mr. Jack O Lantern wont be getting one red cent from me. Oh well Mr. Worst night mare,,,, this should only serve to alert you to the fact that i am always 15 steps ahead of you.
Sincerely
Girl who has a shot pen AND will be going to China

ps i cant believe u created a new email address just to do this….awesome procrastination skills

 
I am an evil genius….hope you are looking forward to my next prank and secretly hoping that you’re not my next victim
Mwaaaahahahahahahahahahahahahaha (that’s an evil laugh in case it wasn’t obvious)

3 Responses to “Prank wars part 1”

  1. Enamuel December 17, 2010 at 3:07 pm #

    How the hell is this a prank???????

  2. Check Pleaseee December 19, 2010 at 3:22 pm #

    Its a prank by nature of the fact that my awesome shot pen was held ransom.

  3. lawschooldrunk May 19, 2011 at 4:01 pm #

    In my humble opinion, I find it disconcerting that a woman with your "extensive vocabulary" uses the word 'awesome' with the frequency you do.

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