Sensitive or post-op transexual?

2 Feb

The events which I am about to discuss literally begged to be written about. I was sitting home reading my notes, after a few distracting and unsettling text messages I was filled with an extremely strong urge to stop what I was doing and document the absurdity of what just transpired. An urge which I could not ignore, so powerful was the need… so here it goes.

It’s one thing when a girl says she wants a guy who is sensitive. I mean, who doesn’t? Everyone wants a partner who is understanding, empathetic, sympathetic and supportive. However, there is a fine line between a guy who is sensitive to your needs or feelings and a guy who is sooooo overly sensitive that it made me wonder if he either:

a)Was a woman in his past life
b)Was a woman a few months ago and underwent a sex change
c)Has a man-gina and was PMS-ing

Granted he did mention that he could be very “girly and mushy” at times all the time (he may or may not have mentioned crying during TV shows and romantic comedies). But this was a whole new experience which I had never encountered before. This guy was so sensitive to the point where anything that I said or DIDN’T say, offended him. Now I know how guys must feel…

Observe:
Me: Yea I think it would be fun to go out in a group, my friend won’t be back for a few days though
Man-gina: Oh, so then I guess you really don’t want to see me that badly if you are willing to wait
Me: haha (thinking he is making a joke) exactly…was it that obvious?
Man-gina: KK BYEE WTVR

The following day I wake up to this:
Man-gina: Way to say good night last night

SERIOUSLY? I met the guy ONCE! Suddenly were at the level where I have to send a good night text??

Man-gina: So I heard all of us are chilling Thursday night
Me: Huh? (this was the first I was hearing about it)
Man-gina: kk thanks never mind I guess
Me: I have an engagement party that night anyway
Man-gina: And you’re going to it?
Me: ummmm yes obviously
Man-gina: K enjoy. cya whenever

What is with the “K BYEE” and “K WTVR”. Am I supposed to pretend not to acknowledge how annoyed he got from my normal behavior? What is up with that? When people say “K BYE” obviously they are upset about something a woman.

Man-gina: You’re in the city?
Me: Yep just left my interview
Man-gina: Come to midtown
Me: Whats in midtown? I’m on my way home now.
Man-gina: You won’t come to midtown? Not even for meeeeeee
Me: haha I really am exhausted
Man-gina: It’s ok I’m not in midtown anyway but nice to know how you feel about me
Me: Huh?
Man-gina: I’m clearly not important enough

Apparently I am extremely insensitive for not rearranging my whole life for this guy who I met ONCE. I’m sorry but – NO! actually I’m NOT sorry. I have a life! Ohh which reminds me of another conversation.

Man-gina: You’re so slow to answer your texts
Me: haha yea it’s hard to believe but I have a life
Man-gina: K no problem BYE

Now readers, I am not exaggerating here right? This guy clearly has serious emotional reactions to casual jokes and comments. Maybe I am just an insensitive person, but I have never dealt with such absurd reactions in my life and my closest friends are ALL WOMEN!!!!

The best part about this whole charade was that when he would make actual offensive comments to me and I reacted to it by giving him a taste of his own medicine, he accused me of “bugging out”. Seriously? That is just hypocritical.

So… what did I take away from this experience? And what lovely intellectual nugget of knowledge shall I pass on to my fellow readers?

Aside from that…

People who take things out of context, over analyze things, or put words in the other persons mouth which make them seem like bad people are predominantly women. As a woman, I know that I have probably jumped to a few conclusions or overreacted to a couple of benign comments in my day. I never really thought much about it before. However, NOW I see how damn annoying it is! I pity the guys who need to deal with girls like that. I wanted to pull my hair out and I quickly tired of having to explain myself and apologize for hurting his feelings 14 times in one day. I didn’t know if it would offend him to offer him a pint of ice cream, some Joanie Mitchell music, and a box of tissues to really solidify the cliche of his existence.

To sum:
Girls: Learn from this story as I have. Don’t be annoying and over analyze every single word your guy says. Jumping to conclusions and assuming the worst is NEVER a good idea and he probably didn’t mean what you thought he meant. After reading an ambiguous comment as yourself “why would he make such mean comment” and if you have no answer, then it must be because he didn’t actually mean what you thought he did.

Guys: Stay manly. Be sensitive to a woman’s feelings, but not TOO sensitive because that really freaked me out! I don’t want a guy who I am going to have to constantly worry about offending. I’m a pretty witty girl and I make lots of sarcastic comments in jest. The guy for me needs to know how to deal with that and reciprocate. I need a manly man who protects me and make me feel safe, not a man who starts dabbing his eyes from Knocked-Up or Two and a Half Men.

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